The answers to these questions can be found in your emotions. The causes of anxiety are often rooted in the way you feel about yourself and what other people think of you. In addition, many anxious feelings come from a fear that something will go wrong—that there won’t be enough time for everything, or that someone might find out about some secret. You may have been told not to care what others think as a child, but it is important now that you know how this message has affected your life and why it no longer works. When an idea takes root in our mind, we become attached to it and see every reason not to change our thoughts or behavior unless we want those fears confirmed by others or ourselves. If we believe “I am worthless because I don’t have my own money” then our self-esteem is very low indeed! On the other hand, if we believe “I am worthwhile after all; I just need more money before anyone else knows my worth” then our self-esteem can improve dramatically with one small step forward into financial security.
In order to begin changing these beliefs which carry so much emotional weight around with them (see chapter 12) you must first identify what they are: where they came from and why do they continue? What makes them seem valid within your environment today? Is this belief still true even though most people would consider it crazy – perhaps even hurting their own happiness? Or does its